Did you picture your current life when you were a child?

I always try to remember what I wanted to be when I was a kid. I think the only thing on my mind when I was a kid was getting the heck out of the tiny town I lived in! I didn't care what I was going to be, I just wanted out! In the fifth grade, we had to do career speeches. We had to choose a career (duh!) that we wanted to be when we grow up! I remember going through at least a half a million careers until finally closing my eyes and randomly pointing to one on my list. I just couldn't decide. (I'm still that way now!) I chose to be a Social Worker for the Homeless. I did a whole bunch of research on it, and the only thing I really remember is that I would help homeless people not be homeless anymore. I guess it was pretty self explanatory. I don't want to do that now because I feel like there is no excuse to be homeless. Get off your butt, get a job, live in a cheap studio apartment, and don't waste your money on stupid things like drugs, alcohol, etc. (Yes, I know that not all homeless people drink or use drugs)

Now, to get back on topic. When I was a kid, I didn't want to grow up at all! I loved playing outside, not having any real responsibilities, and I could spend all day riding my bike! FREEDOM!!! Then, life got very tough for me when I turned about 10, then I couldn't wait to grow up! I am not going to go into very many details about why, but that was when I had the urge to LEAVE town, and never look back! I wanted nothing to do with anything I was around. I wanted to move to a big city, have my own place, make new friends, and not be controlled by others! Everyone around me expected me to grow up and act like an adult, so I did, and so the only thing I wanted was to actually be that adult I was had to act like.

I never imagined I would be where I am at today. I have a husband, a step son, a daughter, and twins (daughter and son). I always had a soft spot for children. They've always loved me, and I loved them! I just didn't want any myself. I picked up, from others experiences, that love doesn't last, and neither do relationships. So, I promised myself that I would never have children because I didn't want them to not have their parents together because of my ''all relationships fail'' logic. I didn't really date as a teenager. I thought boys cute, and had my share of crushes, like everyone else, I just never had the desire to make a commitment. I didn't want to rely on anyone.

When I was 19, I moved to Germany, where I was stationed in the military. I was fresh out of high school, fresh out of Army training, and very single. I got to Germany on November 8, 2009. I met my now husband 6 days later, and we've been inseparable every since. He was great! I love him to death, and I found that one! But, I was overly skeptical and it almost cost me my relationship. I couldn't let go! I was sure that everyone loses their first love, and relationships always fail (it didn't help he was going through a divorce at the time too) that I just held on to myself. But I finally let go. I gave myself to my, now husband. It took a lot of patients on Brandon's part, for sure, but I am glad I did. I do not regret it at all.



Love aside, my career was set. On September 11, 2007, I made a commitment to the Army. They were my way out! FINALLY!!! I loved the military, and I miss it so much. If given the option, I would return to active duty today! Then when I became pregnant, I had to make a choice, my career or my daughter. I of course, chose my baby. Being in the military with another service member, makes having a family very difficult. I went to college, after leaving the military in 2010, and accomplished my Associates Degree.

Now, here I am today! I have 4 kids, and a husband, and we live back in Michigan, and the only thing I want for my kids is that freedom I use to feel before I turned 10 years old! I don't regret my decisions, or my bumps I had to hurdle through. I did not picture my life being the way it is now, and it isn't perfect, but I really do love it!